Here are some other examples of how we unknowingly create separation.
A so-called gap of disconnection arises when what you aim for in life, what you wish for, does not match your beliefs.
What do I mean by that? To clarify, I will give you an example.
You may wish to be an excellent speaker. But if you are afraid of the spotlight shining on you, then your beliefs of fear, of not being able or capable of something you wish for, are dimming the light of your being.
It is only when you summon up all the desire and courage within you to reach that wish—and by adjusting your limited beliefs—that you will eventually reach your destination and experience with enjoyment your goal.
It is a mastery of the mind and feeling. Or you may call it the marriage of thought and feeling, for that is what that journey is.
Another example is when you have limited beliefs about love and desire. Feeling that they are different from each other, not knowing where they come from and where it will lead you.
Let’s say, you were brought up in a family that struggled in life.
As a child, you have seen and experienced the struggle of your parents to fit in with a new society within a different culture. A culture that places value on the materiality of life.
You witnessed the difference. You experienced it within the home, within your environment, and within your own being. You saw your father working until his bones grew old, enduring all the hard work, decades of hard work. And still, no Mercedes in front of the house.
Your mother who was the epitome of love and goodness, accepting of all that came on her path, accepting it with dignity, with love for her children, nourishing them with her love, with her food, with all her creativity, pressing them against her chest. And in every situation where you were naughty and your father would beat you up, she would comfort you with her warmth and love. Because it is hard. Life is hard.
And still, that love did not bring the materiality that you so desired, that you so wanted to be part of.
And when you compared that abundance of love to things that may have been in lack, you would blame that love for not being strong enough, for being weak, for not being able to create more things with that love, to attain all those pleasures that you could see in other people’s lives and not present in your own home.
Those who have experienced love have felt it. Remember that feeling.
That abundant state of being may have been expressed abundantly in always having food on the table when you needed it; having always received a cuddle and compassion when you needed it; having always received home-knitted sweaters and socks when you needed them.
That abundant state of being activates all the creativity within you, even when you do not have much. It activates all that is within your being to do as much as you can, to create with it as much as you can, to give as much as you can without asking for anything in return.
Being that abundant state of being, being that light, doesn’t need to be loud. It can be very humble. It is the highest state of service you can give.
And you may have lost that awareness of what has been given to you as something that came naturally, or lost that awareness of the goodness that is within each being, the understanding that it is a strength of humanity itself to create from that abundant state of being, to create with it and share it.
Without that awareness, as you grow older, you can’t seem to balance out these conflicting energies within. Conflicting energies, when the soul pulses ‘this yes’ and ‘that no’ and when the mind pulses ‘this yes’ and ‘that no.’ And so, not knowing where to turn.
The reasonable one has learned to stay in the safe lane. But the reasonable one does not surpass their own limitations. They do not surpass the separation within. They are simply stuck there.
To move beyond that limitation, they have to surpass the limitations of life as they know it to be, which is ‘sur-vivre.’ That is what surviving means: ‘the surpassing of life you know yourself to be and experience.’ For experience is all you have in life. Experience is what makes you you. All the experiences you have lived through, are living through and will live through, are what makes you who you are.
That is who you are, and that burning desire for more of that you to be “slowly shown only what you know the limits of”, which Leonard Cohen sang about in his song “Dance Me To The End Of Love.”
The desire that springs from the fullness of your being always leads you to that more of you, knowing that through that love, you’ll experience no end to that love.
On the other hand, desiring from the sense of a separate self will lead you to experiences that will confirm separation to creation, albeit with a temporary connection to be lost again.
It is that feeling of attaining it to lose it again that is looped like a scene on a film screen to be played out in front of your eyes repeatedly until death.